Little things, BIG difference: Door greeting

Posted in Marriage Monday with 6 comments

For the next few weeks I will be sharing some tips on the small things you can do to make BIG differences in your marriage. It really is the small moments that make or break a marriage, isn’t it? Your everyday interactions build you up or bring you down as a couple. Sometimes we tend to focus on the BIG issues like sex, finances, and kids when those things might just be a little easier if we loved each other better in the little things each and every day.

To start off, I’m about to share a tip with you that may change your marriage. If anything, I think it will make each day better that you spend with your spouse, from the moment you see them after work. Are you ready?

Greet them at the door.

Couple hugging

It doesn’t sound like much, I know. But it can be the difference between a stressful night and a blessing-filled night after work.

When you greet your significant other as soon as they walk in, you are showing them several things:

  1. That you missed them.
  2. That you couldn’t wait to come love on them.
  3. That nothing else is as important to you as they are.

In our house, I stay at home with our little guy so it is Matt who comes home each day. I didn’t always used to greet him this way. I used to look up from the couch and say hi or immediately ask him for help in the kitchen as soon as he walked through the door. I can’t remember what changed, exactly, but I decided I needed to get up or completely stop what I am doing to greet him and as soon as I started doing this, there was a change. We were connected more, we had calmer nights, and everything seemed to go a little smoother in the evenings. It’s a big deal and Matt has even told me how much it means to him. Even when he doesn’t tell me, I see a huge difference in him when I don’t greet him as opposed to when I do. It boosts his confidence and makes him feel loved, and that is exactly what I want to do for my husband.

I appreciate it too! There are times I come home from Bible study or an outing with friends and if I walk into the house with no one to greet me it feels sad. My favorite days are when I come home and Matt opens the door to the garage as soon as I am pulling in to say “Hi!”. It fills my heart to know that he is excited to see me.

I’ve heard the advice “Make sure you always beat the dog to the door when greeting your husband!”. Well, we had a dog and I can tell you that’s pretty darn hard to do. BUT, I like the point of it. Dogs are always so happy and excited to see their owners come home and we love being greeted by our pets. How much more important is it to greet our husbands and wives?

Try it out. Don’t tell your spouse what you are going to do, just start doing it. Start greeting them each and every day. As soon as you hear the garage door opening or hear the doorknob turn, stop what you are doing and go hug the love of your life. It is one of the simpilest, but most important things you can do for them each day!

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  1. Bonny @oysterbed7

    “Make sure you always beat the dog to the door when greeting your husband!” This made me chuckle. I have not heard that particular phrase before and I LOVE it. I did not do this the first decade of our marriage. I never even realized it was a thing. Until one day, my husband told me how much it would mean to him. I strive to meet him now. But, your phrase means I need to up my game. You are right, it is very hard to beat the dogs to the door. I’ll need to hone my spider sense for when he gets home for that! Great encouragement, Erin, thank you for this post.

  2. Heather B

    This is great! I need reminders like this. You’re so right, and in doing these little things we honor God and see how He honors our marriages for it. I just finished reading a brand new book with this attitude in mind – of effectively influencing our marriages in a positive way by chaining what we can – ourselves – our attitudes, actions, decision, priorities and words. It’s called “The Wholehearted Wife: 10 Keys to a More Loving Relationship,” by Erin, Greg and Gary Smalley. Biblical, inspirational, affirming. One of my favorite quotes is, “If you want to have a more loving relationship with your husband, remember that he’s a gift from God, a treasured possession – just as you are. As a Wholehearted wife, seek to honor him each day by cherishing him and affirming his value. Treat him like a Stradivarius!” and “Keep in mind that a wholehearted wife focuses first on her own heart!” I highly recommend it!

  3. Betty

    Thanks for sharing :) I love the idea how little things can make a big difference. I am sure going to try this simple act to my hubby! I hope all goes well :)

  4. Linda

    My husband of 49 years and I are retired and are together every day. I have, over the last month, began to focus on showing my love for him more often in little things. I get up about 2 hrs. earlier than he does so when he comes down the stairs I try to greet him with a hug and have his coffee brewing and his paper brought in and waiting for him in his chair.(I’ve heard him stirring and know he’s on his way down.) I know he appreciates these little things and I also receive a blessing knowing I’ve done something nice for him from my heart. Thank you for this encouraging post.

  5. Wendy

    I always greet my hubby like this. Big smile, big hug, how was your day? He lights up and we spend time talking about him. Unfortunately when I come home it’s a different story. I usually have to go find him. Most of the time he’s watching TV and looking at his phone. I barely get a hello and if we do talk it’s about his day. I tried talking to him about this but he just got defensive. Hey, at least the dog greets me !